Understanding Dissociation: A Parts-Based Approach to Healing

What is Dissociation?

Many people seek therapy because they feel disconnected from themselves or the world around them. They describe feeling numb, foggy, or detached—as if they are watching their life happen rather than living it. Some struggle with memories that feel distant or unreal, while others experience gaps in time or feel as if they are shifting between different versions of themselves.

Dissociation is a natural survival response that helps the mind protect itself during overwhelming or traumatic experiences. When something feels too intense or painful to process, the brain compartmentalizes the experience—creating distance between our awareness and what is happening. While this can be a helpful coping mechanism at the time, dissociation can persist long after the danger has passed, making it difficult to feel present, connected, or in control of one’s emotions and behaviors.

If you’ve ever wondered, Why do I feel so disconnected? Why do I react in ways I don’t understand? Why can’t I feel like “myself”?—you are not alone. The parts-based approach can help you make sense of these experiences and begin the process of healing.

How Parts Work Can Help

Dissociation often involves a division of the self into different parts, each carrying its own emotions, memories, and survival strategies. According to the structural dissociation model (Van der Hart, Nijenhuis, & Steele), this is not the same as having separate personalities—it is simply how the mind adapts to trauma.

Through a parts-based approach, we explore these different aspects of self, helping them work together instead of feeling fragmented or in conflict. Some of the Most Common Parts Seen in Therapy

  • The Everyday Functioning Part (Apparently Normal Part - ANP) – Focused on handling daily life, appearing “fine” while often feeling numb, disconnected, or detached from emotions and past trauma.

  • The Protective Parts (Emotional Parts - EPs) – Work to keep you safe through survival strategies like suppressing emotions, avoiding triggers, staying hypervigilant, or using fight, flight, freeze, submit, or attach-for-survival responses to perceived threats. Some parts may push others away for protection, while others desperately seek connection to stay safe. These parts can also carry overwhelming emotions, such as fear, shame, or sadness, or may hold deep attachment needs and longings for safety and care.

  • The Inner Critic – One of the most common protective parts, the Inner Critic holds self-blame, shame, or judgment as a way to maintain control and prevent further harm. It often internalizes the voice of past abusers or societal messages about self-worth.

Each of these parts exists for a reason—they have helped you survive. But when they remain stuck in old patterns, they can cause distress, disconnection, and inner conflict. Therapy helps you understand these parts, build internal communication, and create a more compassionate and integrated sense of self.

Common Signs of Dissociation

Recognizing dissociation can be challenging because it often feels normal or has been present for so long that it goes unnoticed. Some of the most common signs include:

Emotional Symptoms

  • Feeling numb or emotionally distant

  • Difficulty identifying or expressing emotions

  • Sudden shifts in mood or personality

  • Feeling like different “versions” of yourself in different situations

Physical Symptoms

  • A sense of floating or feeling "out of body"

  • Feeling disconnected from physical sensations (hunger, pain, pleasure)

  • Unexplained fatigue or dizziness

  • Unusual pain or body symptoms without a clear medical cause

Cognitive Symptoms

  • Memory gaps or missing time

  • Feeling like the world is unreal or dreamlike (derealization)

  • Feeling detached from yourself (depersonalization)

  • Struggling to focus or feeling like your mind goes blank

Behavioral Symptoms

  • Acting in ways that feel out of character or automatic

  • Avoiding emotions or certain memories at all costs

  • Feeling like different parts of you are in conflict

  • Engaging in self-destructive behaviors as a way to manage distress

If any of these experiences resonate with you, know that you are not broken—your mind has simply adapted to survive. Therapy can help you understand these patterns and begin to feel more present, whole, and in control.

What Therapy Looks Like

Healing dissociation is not about forcing parts of yourself to disappear—it’s about building understanding, communication, and internal safety.

In therapy, we will work on:

  • Identifying and Understanding Your Parts – Helping you recognize and connect with the different aspects of yourself.

  • Building Internal Communication – Creating a space where your parts can express their needs in a safe and constructive way.

  • Regulating the Nervous System – Developing grounding techniques to help you feel more present and in control.

  • Processing Trauma Safely – Addressing painful memories at a pace that feels manageable.

  • Developing Self-Compassion – Learning to approach all parts of yourself with curiosity and care, rather than judgment or fear.

You Are Not Alone

If you’ve been struggling with dissociation, there is hope. Healing is possible when we learn to understand and support the different parts of ourselves.

I specialize in trauma-informed, parts-based therapy, and I am here to help you reconnect with yourself in a way that feels safe and empowering.